Take a minute a think about the roles we play in our lives. They are roles of which we may not be fully aware. Among our friends, family, and co-workers we may be known as the pretty one, the smart one, the dumb one, the independent one, the nurturing one, the strong one, the single one, or a myriad of other ones. Without being fully aware, we play our roles to satisfy others. However, those very same roles could be choking us and keeping us from growing.

Examine the roles you are playing for others. The roles that are based on expectations of those around us. If they don't work for you, try new ones. It may be uncomfortable for you or others initially, but eventually you will grow into the person you want to be. Eventually you will be a genuine person, and in turn will attract genuine people.

Stir it up: Take a moment and answer these few self-exploratory questions:

• What is my favorite food?
• What is my favorite color?
• What is my favorite movie?
• What is my favorite television show?
• What do I like to read?
• What kind of climate do I like?
• What is my dream job?
• What kind of clothes do I like?
• What excites me?
• What makes me afraid?
• What bores me?
• What does my body want to do?
• What do I want to say?
• What do I want to hear?
• What am I here to achieve
• What are my gifts?
• What do I treasure?

  When you read through these questions I hope you find that you know the answers and regularly experience the things you love on a regular basis. If not, it may well mean you are stuck in a role others have created for, and that you are not fully experiencing a life you really want. I encourage you to start by slowly and steadily working your pleasures into your life. For example, if red is your favorite color, but your mother hates it, ask yourself if you could be comfortable wearing it anyway. If not outwardly at first, try red socks or red undies. The color of your clothes may be a trival example, but I encourage you to explore areas in your life, which you may be suppressing because others may not like it for you. Then ask yourself if you can continue to be you without doing what you love.

Brooke Brimm

Brooke Brimm has a Master's degree in Professional Counseling and 8 years experience in the field of Human Science. She has been married since 1993 and has two beautiful daughter ages 9 and 5. Ms. Brimm currently authors an ezine, Love's Gumbo, which discusses love, relationships, and friendships in today's society.